What is up with Craigslist?

[dt]

What is up with Craigslist?

A couple weeks ago, someone on the forum sent me a link to a neat vintage bike for sale on Craigslist. Thanks, I already did that bike. Actually, I’m an eBayer and never used or looked at CL. Since then I’ve been checking CL daily on the chance I’ll trip over a local vintage restorer. While I haven’t seen a bike worth looking into, I must say that day-in, day-out I’m amazed at some of the ludicrous, bizarre, silly and downright ignorant posts that people put in there.

Below are some goofy listings just from today’s Tampa Bay Motorcycle listings. I’ll bet you guys can find and maybe share some other bizarre CL listings. Man, I hope none of these are any of your listings…...

Here’s a dirt bike for $700. The seller says he needs to sell it THIS WEEKEND, a then fails to describe the make, model, year, engine size, condition, etc. etc. Geesh!

http://tampa.craigslist.org/psc/mcy/901566644.html

Here’s an 85 atc something for sale. The listing says that it only needs a new piston, “but there’s nothing else wrong.” Really? Just a piston? I suppose he thinks that you simply screw the old one out and screw the new one in.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hdo/mcy/901901714.html

Here’s a 2003 Honda 750 that’s never been “dropped,” like when his mom dropped him on his head when he was three-months-old.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/901869974.html

Here’s a three wheel something where the guy says, “I’ve started to repair…, but haven’t finished.” He hasn’t finished? It looks like it's been sitting on the bottom of the Gulf for seven years. He didn’t even blow the dust off and wants $500.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/psc/mcy/901804995.html

Here’s a guy selling a miserable, unpadded, chalky, flat-black helmet. He says he’s from (new poort richey). Huh? I'm from tampu and I type Tanpu right every single time I write Uptam. Dude, get two things right every time: your name and your city, just like I get Tampon right, every time.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/psc/mcy/901784581.html

Here’s another helmet; it’s “woman owned.” Really? We couldn’t tell that it was “woman owned” with those BRIGHT PINK FLAMES all over it. At least she listed the size, unlike Mr. new poort richey.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/901653330.html

Here’s a “non-nicer” 2005 Honda. Okay, but grammatically speaking, there’s no 2005 Honda that's worse.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/901641142.html

Here’s a guy selling an ATV and says, “Bought bike then got married and had 2 kids in the last 4 yrs, so there was no time to ride.” There “was” no time to ride? Dude, come on….got married, had two kids...the bike was in the garage, but YOU WERE riding.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/psc/mcy/901505752.html

Seen any better, or worse, than these?

[bagobones]

We need to start a separate category for you and your CL rants. That was some of the funniest stuff I have read on this forum yet. Woooo...my gut hurts. NICE

[dt]

It’s only Sunday at 8AM and we’ve already got some remarkable listings on Craigslist in the Tampa Bay Motorcycle listings.

Here’s a dad selling his son’s TTR-90, and writes: “Selling becuase [because] son has ouotgrown [outgrown] it and looking for a 65cc to upgradee [upgrade].” Assuming I can read this, with all the typos, going from a 90cc to a 65cc is an upgrade?

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/902204554.html

Here’s a scooter that’s, “almost bran new.” I’m thinking there’s a 50% chance that this person thinks that’s not a typo.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/902139054.html

Here’s a 2000 R-6 for sale that was “in an accedent [accident], but the damage was all cosmetic, and there’s no title because the insurance company totaled it.” I’ll paraphrase…my insurance company thinks it’s a total loss; I think it’s slightly blemished. I’ll paraphrase, again…my insurance company owns the title, but I’m going to sell it anyway.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/902107554.html

“Dale, I lost your number. It’s Adam, call me.”
Adam, its DT2MX. Try a phone book. We’re looking for motorcycles here.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/psc/mcy/902103764.html

Here are 2 Tamoto dirt bikes for sale. I think the song goes something like, “You say Tamoto … I say Yamoto….” Seriously though, isn’t it strange how speech impediments find their way into our writing? Anyway, if this guy was selling a Tamaha, Tuzuki, or Tonda, I’d call.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/902038590.html

Here’s a 2005 Yamaha in “land I lakes.” For those of you not from this area, land I lakes is very near new poort richey.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/902356799.html

And, finally……

The listing is for Harley parts where the seller doesn’t know what he’s selling. It goes like this, “Look ... i don't have time to look it up......If you will just be honest with me and not tell me how worthless this stuff is whilst you slobber uncontrollably over the phone, i will sell the lot CHEAP !”

He doesn’t want us slobbering uncontrollably?

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/902494612.html

[mrbones]

You have me to thank for introducing you to the wonderful world of the Craigslist marketplace for motorcycles. The ones you posted are so funny, man.

I found a few myself today.

Here's a fine CX500 for $3500 (it was $3650 on a previous ad). "1979 Honda CX50 in near mint condition. Has not been riden since 1984. Must go out the door." Besides the typos, $3500?!! It hasn't been started in 24 years! I'll give you $100 for it!

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/900333241.html


This is a fine editorial on Chinese scooters, I think. It's so precise and insightful. I think he should be a writer for Cycleworld.

"The Japs like Yamaha and Honda (yup honda too) have parts built in China. That don't mean that these china scooters are approved by them. The Chinese "clone"
the jap designs and use them in their own products. Some are better than others.
Problem is that the importers have few requirments to be a dealer. Here today, gone tomorrow."

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/902340513.html


I love old Honda's, but a CB750 for $7000? WTF?

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/901819299.html

[mrbones]

Thanks for the lead on the helmet. This is steal at $10.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/psc/mcy/901784581.html

[mrbones]

I'd like to see this '68 Sportster do 120 mph. What's with the drag bar risers and the buckhorn handlebars?

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/902664012.html

[mrbones]

Here's a fantastic bargain. A 2000 Sportster 883 for $5800. But hurry! The seller says "great bike wont last". Oh, and for the record I paid $2800 for my '98 Sportster before the economy took a dump.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hdo/mcy/900528336.html

[dt]

I once owned a Sporty (albeit a 1974) and it was not close to a 120 mph bike; 50 miles on that tiny tank of gas, too.

On the prices being asked….whether on Craigslist or eBay, the number of Harleys for sale is staggering. At this moment, there are 7,800 bikes for sale on eBay; 2,400 are Harleys…then, 1,400 Hondas, 800 Yamahas, etc. So of all the brands of bikes for sale, over one-third of them on eBay are HD! I don’t know about CL, but I’m thinking that someone selling and HD at the moment is lucky if a prospective buyer sees their listing, say nothing of showing some real interest.

Speaking of Sportster’s, below is a pic of a legend in vintage motocross. The guy won two American Historic Racing Motorcycle Association (AHRMA) Open-Class Championships on a 1965 Sporty! I'd never have thought of that.

[mrbones]

The prices for Harley bikes range from on occasional bargain to crazy high. Most of them aren't even paid for and that's why people try to sell them for so high. They are trying to get out of their loan and the pay off amount is nuts.

I think the Sportster is one of the most customizable bikes in history. It can be any thing you want it to be. From chopper, bobber, flat tracker to vintage motorcrosser it can do a lot of things. And you get one newer than '86, they are super reliable like a Jap bike. I love mine.

Funny though how it took Harley 20 years to catch of in terms of reliability to Jap counter parts. It wasn't until 2000 when they finally switched to sealed wheel bearings. Those have been on Hondas for how long? At least 30 years.

[mrbones]

Here's a CX500 that appears to be reasonably priced. He says to go to an ebay auction to bid on it. The auction number he gives is for a 1989 Cadillac Eldorado. Dumb ass!

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/905347325.html

[dt]

LOL...I'm telling you...we could go on and on about Craigslist and all the bizzare examples that they offer up. Pick any three and one will knock you out.

The listing you copied with the reference to the eBay auction is now "Flagged for Removal." You probably know this already, but if you click the "flagged" you can read Craigslist policies, where if enough viewers flag a listing for removal it's automatically removed. I guess that's what happened here and a bunch that I'd copied earlier.

I think some of the hardcore Craigslisters get pretty serious about the stuff in there. Look at this:

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/904216590.html

If it's been "Flagged for Removal" by the time you get to it, it said: TO THE DIM BULB THAT CANT FIGURE OUT THIS IS FOR MOTORCYCLES FOR SALE, then goes on to quote the policies...

[dt]

Rant on…


“hi i have a baja 90cc dirtbike 4 speed simi manual no clutch nice bike for a young kid to start on ...its been siting for about a year now so it needs its crab cleaned and a little cleaning....”

No one wants a bike that has crabs.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/902639202.html

*****

“Custom made pull behind trailer all dimaond plate with mounted dry box, all it need is the wirirng for the lights, $400.00 O.B.O. or trade for small dirt bike”

When you say “trailer,” you can probably skip the “pull behind” part.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hdo/mcy/905271353.html

*****

“1989 yamaha yz125 starts on first kick, little rough around the edges wont last long 500 dollars.”

Most folks would like to buy a bike that will last long.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/903054648.html

*****

“(2) vintage mopeds with very low miles that run good. These are difficult to find for collectors and fun to ride if not! 20 mph with current set up. Speed kits available ”

Uhh, fun to ride if not what?

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/902866404.html

*****

“Specializing in custom powder coating. Bikes, auto, marine. Give us a call 813-391-4682. Sahrp Customs, 6001 Johns Road.”

Your name is Sharp Customs. Look at the sign on your building.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/903569168.html

*****

“I have a like new Polini Dirt bike water cooled and automatic. Disk breaks. This is a 2 stroke and looks and runs great. Has been stored and not ridden much at all as you can see in the pictures…”

How often does the disk break?

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hdo/mcy/904540045.html

*****

“Two Honda SOHC 750's. One on tne floor {a Night Hawk] with stuck engine, a second engine, also stuck, and more parts than I can count. Tanks, wheels, seats, and all the misc. little parts to build yourself a cheap/cool hotrod. I am willing to divide/trade.”

The engines are stuck…to the floor? I've never seen such a pile of shit.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/906150462.html

*****

“We have 3 PINK Vespa Style Scooters left in our inventory that we need to sell QUICKLY! This style scooter normally sells at our shop for $899 but we have taken $200 off each scooter for quick sales! This is for the PINK Scooters only!”

Okay, okay, only the PINK Vespas are on sale. Why on earth do you have 3 PINK Vespas in your inventory to begin with?

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/905735082.html

*****

“2002 YAMAHA V-STAR 650 GOOD CONDITION 14,700 MILES. $2800 OR BESS OFFER”

Don't wait around for Bess’s offer. Take any good offer.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/905247823.html

*****

“50 cc scooter for sale willing to trade for a beat up civic or some thing along those lines no low ballers price is firm clean title as well”

No low ballers? How much lower can we go than a “beat-up” Civic?

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/904766468.html

*****

“Are you tired of paying a shop $70 an hour for your repairs? If so bring it to us! We have two certified mechanics and all the tools. Only $45 PER HOUR! We are working out of our garage at our house for now.”

They have mechanics, with tools, as opposed to mechanics, without tools. Perhaps before they upgraded their facilities, customers supplied the bike and the tools.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/904761251.html

*****

“I AM SELLING MY BIKE, JUST NOT INTERESTED IN IT ANYMORE. IT IS A MUST SEE TO APPRECTIATE IT.”

Why, you obviously don’t.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/904678502.html

*****

“This is a great bike was always good to me FAST has tag bars, race tech suspension. It runs good just needs a chutch cable, seat cover is torn, and numbers are gone on sides. Comes with 4 tires two back two front.”

Looking at your pictures, I count six…

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/904675075.html

*****

“2005 kx 65 my son rode this bike at his gradmother's house.”

We don’t care.

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/905945006.html

[dt]

Rant on....(Just posted. I can't sit on this one.)

“COME ON EVEN EVERY ONE KNOWS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A HARLEY AND A JAP - $10000: TO ALL THAT DONT NO WHAT A HARLEY IS THIS IS A HARLEY YOUR JAP BIKE IS NOT!!I DONT CARE WHAT YOU HAVE OR WHO THINKS YOUR BOULAVARD LOOKS LIKE A WHAT? OH YA A HARLEY THE BIKE BUILT BY AMERICANS FOR AMERICANS SO TAKE YOUR JAP BIKE AND PLEASE RIDE IT ALL DAY PROUD AND THEN COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR ECONOMY WHEN YOUR MONEY WENT OUT OF THIS COUNTRY GOOD JOB SPORT I HOPE IAM MANNING THE GATE ON JUDGEMENT DAY IF YOU CANT SUPPORT YOUR OWN GO LIVE WITH THE ONES YOU SUPPORT!!!”


Uh…sir…what kind of car is that in the picture next to your All American Motorcycle?

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hdo/mcy/906179977.html

[mrbones]

Looks like a British car there, lol.

Manning the gate on judgement day? WTF?

Lets see, how many Japanese parts are on your Harley? The forks, the shocks, the wheels, the carb, the petcock. I'm sure there's more. What a moron.

[FLBiker]

I bleed Harley. All American all the way!

[dt]

I bleed dirt. Harley hasn’t offered a serious dirt bike since the Baja in 1971, although they talk about it now and then. The current talk…actually more than talk, apparently they have a prototype…is release of a competition motocross bike by Buell in 2008…a little late, so now it’s 2009…next year it will be 2010, etc. Anyway, if I trade in my YZ for the Buell, eventually, is it arguable that I bleed dirt and Harley? Or is Buell just Harley’s Skunk Works?

[Jford]

Thanks for the laughs. I wet my pants laughing on those.

[dt]

I now have another online auction site to rant on: eBay.

I’m parting out one of my bikes and put the first fifteen parts up in auctions on Sunday. Two of the fifteen got cancelled by eBay Motors and I got a temporary suspension.

I listed a Used Mikuni 36mm Model VM36 Round Barrel Carburetor. It was cancelled because it is against eBay policy to sell firearms. (36mm...now that's one hell of a bullet!)

I listed the Frame, with a clear Florida Title. It was cancelled because it is against eBay policy to sell a vehicle title, without the vehicle. (Do they think the title is in a picture frame?)

On the temporary suspension, which resulted from being caught red-handed by the eBay police selling these prohibited items, I was required to take a stupid on-line test on eBay policies in order to resume my seller status. I did it...took only a couple minutes. I'm back in business.

To their credit, they did refund the listing fees.

[Jford]

That is ridiculous!

[FLBiker]

I bleed dirt. Harley hasn’t offered a serious dirt bike since the Baja in 1971, although they talk about it now and then. The current talk…actually more than talk, apparently they have a prototype…is release of a competition motocross bike by Buell in 2008…a little late, so now it’s 2009…next year it will be 2010, etc. Anyway, if I trade in my YZ for the Buell, eventually, is it arguable that I bleed dirt and Harley? Or is Buell just Harley’s Skunk Works?

Harley own Buells, but it aint no Harley. Unless it has the infamous Harley shield on it, its still a Buell.

[mrbones]

Here's a GREAT ad.

"choper - $6500"

call 863-398-7035

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/mcy/920894162.html

That's it. That's the whole ad!! Just makes you want to buy it huh?

[dt]

Yes, a one-word listing, AND I see he misspelled it at that. Typical Craigslist!

[dt]

Hey Bones. Here’s a good one. Here’s a guy that put 7 miles on a new Honda and has to sell. I’m sure the circumstances are real, but for the hell of it I looked up the MSRP. It’s $6,799. So much for the fees!

“2009 Honda Shadow Aero 750 Classic Titanium/White - $7500: Beautiful, Brand New!! Bought bike one week ago - only 7 miles on it!  Must sell due to circumstances beyond my control. Hate to sell the bike, but must! No Freight! No Dealer Prep! No Fees! No Dealer Set-up charges! Call Bob

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/920799794.html

[dt]

Considering this guy misspelled helmets “three times,” I must conclude that he doesn’t know how to spell helmet. Perhaps, his extra-small helmets have been a little too tight?

TWO MOTORCYCLE HELMUTS (THE GROVES): 2 helmuts size XS size small white full face HJC CL HELMUTs -- DOT CERTIFIED 2 for 45.00 or one for 25.00

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/921297055.html

Here’s a first. This guy will trade his helicopters and toy cars for your motorcycle.

“trade? for the right streetbike? i have all kinds of things to trade for the right bike.including a mitsubishi 3000gt,rc cars trucks and helis, jetski...and lots more..lets make a deal!”

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/921498441.html

Observation…I encounter the word “brakes” misspelled “breaks” on Craigslist, probably 75% of the time!

“Honda 2001 Cr 250, Great Bike Very Fast Well maintained. Polished Frame swing arm & Rims, ProTaper Bars, New Break pads,”

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/921450290.html

Lady! Too Much Information (“T.M.I.”)! Geesh!

“2003 Harley Davidson Anniversary.....Like Brand New 1100 miles - $4500: This is a 2003 Anniversary 883 Sportster that has 1100 miles on it. The bike was purchased by my granfather who had his lef amputated just months after purchasing it and shortly after he passed away. The Bike Has only 1100 Miles, An extra seat that he purchased as well as the stock one, And we thought we lost the key so my Grandma had 2 copies made through Harley and then found the original so there are 3 keys, She also purchased a new Battery from Harley just weeks ago for it as well. I am sure that it is going to need new spark plugs just from sitting and probably new oil and gas but nothing other than that. My Grandma is in the need of the Money and she only wants $4500.00 Firm. If you have any questions you can contact myself or my husband. Thanks”

http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/921410631.html

Craigslist…the last resort for the CREDIT IMPAIRED:

“Anyone Take Payments for Bike$$$: Needing Bike ASAP, Lookin to make payments for bike, WIll sign contract or payment plan i necessary!!!” http://tampa.craigslist.org/psc/mcy/921402104.html

“Is there anyone on here(scooters): that would let me make payments on a 49cc or 50cc scooter it wont take long and shops dont msg me because i dont have good credit please email me and let me know thank u!!” http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/920567776.html

“i recently lost my bike and am trying to get back on 2 wheels. i have no transportation at the moment so im hoping to get some soon. i have about $300 to put down and can pay about $300-$350 a month and can pay the remaining balance off in may. i`ve called everyone asking and nobody will take payments for 6 months untill i can pay it off. let me know if we can work something out.” http://tampa.craigslist.org/psc/mcy/918099732.html

 “I had my motorcycle stolen and i didn't have any inssurance. I know....stuppid! its been 3 yrs and im still paying on it. Im looking for a GSXR 750 or something similar. Just wanna get ridding again. Im not looking for a handout but i am looking for someone who has a bike that wouldnt mind doing payments or something as i dont have alot of money to put down. I would appreciate any help.” http://tampa.craigslist.org/pnl/mcy/909763576.html

“I am looking for a motorcycle with a title to ride on the street. I am looking between 500 and 1500. But the best bet is some sort of payment plan (say like 100 a week till it is paid off). If you are interested in doing a payment plan, please let me know ASAP! http://tampa.craigslist.org/hdo/mcy/915528433.html

“Bike on payments!! - $5Yea im ready to give you my bike on payments.we will draw up a contract on some T/P so when you dont pay me i can whipe my ass with it.why dont you try the local dealer first.or is your credit as f( censored )ked as mine??? http://tampa.craigslist.org/psc/mcy/921437124.html

There's a cool picture of Mr. Spock in the last one there. Look quick, it'll get yanked.

[bagobones]

He dont know abouth motocycles but his sons choper has lot of crome.

http://chicago.craigslist.org/nwc/mcy/919306567.html